The First Christmas Nobody Warns Ambitious First Time Moms About
I got lucky and got to spend my daughter's first Christmas with her. Most ambitious first time moms don't. Here's the truth about maternity leave nobody tells you, and what I'm building so I never have to gamble on timing again.
Who This Is Article For?
This one's for you if:
- You're pregnant, or newly a mom, and you're already dreading the day you have to hand her back and go to work.
- You want to be present for every first, not just the ones that happen to land on a day off.
- You're starting to realize maternity leave started a postpartum return to work countdown in your mind.
- You want to build something of your own before the holidays hit, not after you've already missed one.
Table of Contents
What Nobody Tells You About Maternity Leave
Here's something most people don't say out loud. Your job owns your time, and maternity leave doesn't change that, it just delays it.
I was so grateful I had eleven weeks of maternity leave. But to be honest, being a first time mom, it didn't feel like it was enough to get to know my baby.
I didn't want to go back. She was getting more active. Smiling more. Starting to baby talk. I wished I was able to stay home with her. I asked my husband. He said it wasn't possible, and the math backed him up.
So instead I watched the holidays go by like a countdown. Every one that passed meant a month gone. By the time Christmas hit, I knew exactly how much time I had left with her, and it wasn't much.
That's a hard thing to live through when you're a first time mom planning to be fully present for the most magical stretch of your life.
The Countdown Nobody Warns You About
Nobody tells you that the moment you meet your baby for the first time, the one you've loved since before you even met her, you're also starting a countdown in your head. A countdown on the feedings. A countdown on the naps you get to be there for. A countdown to daycare.
I still wanted to breastfeed my daughter. She was born with tongue ties. I spent so much time working with a lactation specialist, doing the exercises, learning her latch, learning her. That time was ours.
We succeeded. Daycare halted the progress. She couldn't latch anymore. All that work, gone, because I had to return to work, not because either of us was ready to be done.
What Going Back Actually Looked Like
Maternity leave ended. I returned to work. I missed so many firsts. Bedtimes. I was able to watch her on my iPhone for five minutes at a time throughout the day it didn't make it easier to be away from her. It sometimes made it harder.
People told me it gets easier. It didn't get easier. I just got better at pushing my feelings down. And pushing feelings down like that doesn't just fade, it messes with your whole well being.
As a first time mom, you deserve better than that. This is supposed to be a beautiful experience from beginning to end.
If this part of the story sounds familiar, I wrote about the full version of it, checking every box and still feeling trapped, in my first post, I Did Everything Right and Still Missed Everything That Mattered.
An Ambitious Woman's Story
Why I Got Lucky, and Why That's the Problem
That timing gave me something most ambitious first time moms don't get. Most go back to work right as the holidays start, work a shift, come home for a few hours, and go back for the holiday shift the next day, right when everyone else is slowing down to be with family.
You shouldn't need good timing to be present for your child's first holiday season.
Signs You're Already Feeling It
- You've started counting down maternity leave before it's even started.
- You're already dreading the daycare conversation.
- You've caught yourself wondering if you even want to go back at all.
- You've thought, even quietly, that there has to be another way.
If any of that is you, keep reading.
What I'm Building Instead
You don't need an entrepreneurial background. I didn't have one either. What you need is to start before the pressure forces your hand, not after.
Even after the baby's here, you can start in the margins. Nap times. Evenings. The in-between moments you already have. It's not too late, and it doesn't require choosing between her and building something of your own.
That's exactly what an online business gave me. Not a shortcut. A way to build something that works around this season of life instead of asking me to disappear from it.
If I had found this online business back then, I would have started building this during my maternity leave. As a first time mom, I know better now, and I don't want to go through the same thing again.
Here's what I'm offering you. A free web class called How to Build a Thriving Business Online. Think of it as the blueprint, the roadmap I followed, that explains the opportunity I'm building. No entrepreneurial background required. It's the same starting point I used.
As soon as you watch it, contact me on TikTok or Pinterest. I would love to hear about the top three things that spoke to you.
FAQ
Can I really start an online business as a new mom?
Yes. You don't need experience, and you don't need to wait until life slows down, because it usually doesn't. You start in the time you already have.
How much time does this actually take with a newborn?
It's built to work in the margins, nap times, evenings, whatever pockets of time you have, not on top of a full time schedule.
Do I need to already know what I'm doing?
No. I didn't either. The free web class walks you through the actual starting point.
I'll see you on the other side of the wait.
