Breaking the Cycle: 7 Steps to a Deeper Relationship With God
You want a deeper relationship with God, but you may not know how to come back or where to begin. I chose to break the cycle for my daughter, and God changed me first. These 7 steps helped me grow spiritually, seek Him daily, and give my daughter a different foundation.
I grew up fearing God without really knowing Him, and for years I lived out of my pain. This is the story of how I came back to the Lord, and how I'm making sure my daughter grows up knowing Him instead.
Who This Is For
- Christian women who walked away from God, or never really knew Him, and are ready to come back
- Christian moms who want their children to know the Lord in a way they didn't growing up
- Christian women planning a Faith-Filled New Year who want family time and spiritual growth to start with coming back to Him
Table of Contents
What Was Passed Down to Me
I grew up in a home that feared God without having a relationship with Him. My parents did the best they could with what they knew, and what they knew was what had been handed to them. There was a lot of chaos in my family when I was young, and I carried it into adulthood. I was living my story out of my pain, stuck in a victim story, and I didn't know how to regulate my emotions. My feelings ran the show.
When I Chose to Break the Cycle
Then I had a daughter, and I knew I didn't want to hand her the same thing. I chose to break the cycle, and I knew I couldn't do it on my own, so I came back to God. I didn't ask for much. I just asked Him to make me a better person. He has been doing it ever since, though it hasn't been painless. He has shown me what real change takes, and some days it's hard to look back at who I was. But every time I came back to Him, He never turned me away.
What Changed
Over time, the way I show up for God changed. I used to go through the motions, showing up because I was supposed to. Now I crave Bible time, fellowship, and church.
Building a relationship with God gave me a path to time freedom and financial freedom. I haven't reached financial freedom yet, and I won't pretend I have, but I'm home with my daughter while I build, and that's something I once thought wasn't possible. She gets a mother who seeks God where she can see it. Sometimes she sits right next to me while I read my Bible. I'm also learning to regulate my emotions in front of her and to show her that feelings are just emotions telling us what's going on, not who we are. I get to build her firm foundation in Christ, and that's family time I don't take for granted. The cycle I inherited doesn't have to be the one she inherits.
The 7 Steps to a Deeper Relationship With God
Coming back started with being honest about where I'd been. These seven daily practices carried me the rest of the way.
- I made time for Him every day. Sometimes it's early in the morning, sometimes it's the evening, but I protect that time wherever it lands.
- I opened the Bible and stayed. I read His Word on my own, and sometimes with my freedom group, which works like a devotional for me, so I'm learning who He is instead of just hearing about Him.
- I told Him the truth. My prayers stopped being rehearsed or saved for emergencies. I bring Him the messy parts and the thank-yous, and I try to get quiet enough to listen.
- I got still. I step away from the noise and sit in stillness, and I ask the Holy Spirit to fill the space the old things left, because if you don't fill it with light, the darkness comes back tenfold.
- I let His will be mine. Not the other way around. I hand Him my plans and my worries, and I'm learning to be grateful for the daily bread in front of me. If I have enough for today, I'll have enough for tomorrow.
- I repented quickly and forgave freely. When He nudges me, I try to obey, and when I fall short, I come to Him that day. He forgives us, so we forgive those who trespass against us and bless them.
- I stayed close to His people. Faith-based mentors spoke life into me when I couldn't speak it myself.
If you've been away, consider this your invitation to come back. If you want a Faith-Filled New Year, start where the cycle starts, with your own relationship with God, and set your Christian goals for the year ahead around that.
FAQ
What are the 7 steps to a deeper relationship with God?
They're what worked for me, not a formula. Start with the one that feels most doable this week and let the rest follow.
What if I've been away from God for a long time?
Start with one honest prayer. He forgives, and you don't have to clean yourself up before you come back.
How do I bring my kids along when I'm just starting again?
Let them see you seek Him, and tell them when you're asking God for help. Children learn more from what you live than from what you say.
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